Fat Clothes

You know how cows in Argentina have been wearing fart bags?

We'll have them, too. Soon.

I know, most people aren't interested in walking around with a tube in their butt. The cows do it, and the tubes feed ino big fart bags. The farmers reclaim the farts somehow, I don't really know. So, because most people on earth are up tight about this crap, humans will just have snug fitting underwear made of "future polymers" that will convert farts into electricity. Somehow.

Here's the selling point: let loose allllll daaayyy looooong. And charge your cell phone on it. Or rather, feed your lab-grown digital helper monkey robot with it. More about those later.

Beyond the magical fart conversion underwear (somehow), we'll have clothes that will restrict movement in order to burn calories. Holy crap!, you say, just put on skinny jeans and go for a run! But that gives you swamp ass, and not everybody looks good in skinny jeans. Instead, we'll have clothes made up of "future polymers" that can be loose fitting, but provide resistance to movement at key areas in order to make it more straining to walk or move, causing you to burn more calories. It would be kind of like wearing ankle weights, but not nearly as dorky or strange. And you could change the settings, so around the house or office your pants are normal, but when you decide to go for a walk outside, just fart once and the pants go into "fat mode". Burn them calories.

Fat clothes. Somehow.